Showing respect for the mourners

It is easy to understand the feelings of sadness, loss and dejection in the person who has lost a loved one. The mourners cry, express discomfort and get stressed very easily, and this is normal. People around the mourner get worried about his wellbeing, his health, and wish he goes through the mourning very soon. However, in many occasions this feeling of sorrow make relatives and friends make the mistake of asking him not to cry anymore, to calm down and almost to go through the mourning right away. These words may have a dramatically negative effect in the mourner and provoke a deep change of humor. The mourning period varies from one person to another; there is not a rulebook to complete this period after the death of a loved one. Mourning is inevitable; at this moment friends and the rest of the family are fundamental.

Showing respect for the mourners means to accompany them and share their pain. In some occasions it is helpful to stay in silence just holding the hand of the person who feels very sad. We can also show respect for the mourner by offering ourselves to make what is needed at home, taking the children to school, going to the supermarket to buy the food. This help could bring the mourner some time to meditate, to stay quiet and get ready to go back to normal life. Another way to show respect to the person who faces the mourning is by listening to him talk about the event, about the deceased and his memories and how much he misses him. When the mourner speaks freely without interruptions, he can get comfort and free himself form what death represents.

The company of relatives and friends, the activities they can offer to the person who faces death as an alternative to drain anguish are also ways to show respect during the mourning without thinking on a fixed period of time to go back to normal life. The thing is to listen carefully, to bring support with lovely phrases, to accompany the mourner and check he eats and rests appropriately; to offer your help, to be patient, and share his pain.